A Year of Inviting

A year ago I joined a group of dreamers...a word that still sounds so foreign to me. But we spent the year getting to know each other, sharing the wins and the setbacks, encouraging each other, and yes, dreaming.

In 2013 my dream focused on inviting others into our home and into our lives. Community is often messy and hard and inconvenient, but it's also refreshing, vital, and life-giving. And so we invite each other in.

2013 was a year of learning what this looked like for us. We did little things like sharing meals and throwing a few parties. A summer intern working at our church lived in our basement. Another friend stayed for a week while his family moved. We had friends stay in our home even though we were out of town. Our backyard filled up with people we love and people we hadn't yet met.

A year ago I didn't know who I would be inviting into our home, but I knew what I wanted our guests, our friends to find when they arrived. A place of comfort, of grace. A place of equal parts deep conversation and light-hearted merriment. A place of peaceful welcome.

A place that reflected our hearts.

My home is far from perfect, and my heart has so much room to grow. This year saw quite a few failures and forgotten goals, but the yeses we said in 2013 are producing growth that extends into 2014. And that's how I'll measure my success.

Happy New Year, dear friends. Looking forward to seeing all God has in store!

Trusting the Process

My draft folder is full of stalled ideas. This one jarred loose. You're joining 

me in pretending I didn't take over a month off, right? You're the best!

I am not a runner. I can barely be considered a person who can run. My fight-or-flight response is stuck on fight, as my brain is aware of my inability to escape. But at some point, the desire to run a 5K grew beyond the strength of my excuses, so I'm in the midst of a feeble attempt at becoming a runner (jogger is more accurate...let's be real).

My encourager with me on a walk.
These trails are the best part of this running thing!

My problem with running is not so much the physical toll as it is the mental panic that sets in when I do feel challenged by the run. I can psych myself out before during and after run. I have talent. So when I looked ahead in my training schedule and saw a jump in the length of intervals, the anxiety started creeping in.

But here's the thing. I ran my scheduled workout, and I had the stamina to complete it. The following workout was more difficult, but again, I had gained the stamina to complete it. Can I run a full 3.1 miles yet? No. But I'm trusting the process.

And that's where I find myself in seeking my God-sized dream. Did I accomplish everything I hoped when we started this journey in January? Nope. We didn't host nearly as many people as I had planned. We still don't have many home projects completed. And I know I'm still heavily lacking in my homemaking skills.

But I also know that I'm in the process. We did choose to invite when we could have avoided. We made progress when we could have stagnated. And I'm gaining confidence where there has been great insecurity. We're sharing our home for the summer and figuring out how to turn friends into community and trusting that this step will lead forward.

I don't have to panic about the full distance. I just have to be faithful with the task He's given to me now and trust that my perseverance will grow. I am challenged to dream, to step out of my comfort zone, to invite God's leading above my own. But I'm also challenged to be present, to love fully, to seek the graces right in front of me. And my, there are many.

Linking up here today. Join us?

Step One: Open the Door

Not my door...theirs.

Last week a big group of lovely ladies posted about their God-sized dreams for 2013. My dream is to intentionally use our home to connect with others, love on whoever God brings through our door, and invite God to use this year to whatever purpose He deems good.

This week Holley urged our team to take a small step to get started, to create just the smallest forward movement in faith, then trust God to grow the momentum and do His big thing.

This past week was full of projects, catching up, and a quick visit to see the nieces, full of the raw materials good excuses are made of. Yet, I'm resisting that ever-constant urge to do so. Yes, life is busy. But I'm choosing to move forward.

In the Do What You Can Plan, Holley writes this about the Proverbs 31 woman: "She does what's simple and straightforward. But she does it with consistency and excellence. Over time, that adds up to much more than her actions each day might convey to those observing."

Admitted, the Proverbs 31 woman and I have never quite seen eye to eye. She stands there all cute in purple, subtlety revealing her strong, defined arms. She gets up early, and sews, and is good at everything that I am not. And yet...the root of my jealously, my feelings of inadequacy, is rooted in exactly what Holley describes..."she does it with consistency and excellence." She shows up, does what she needs to do, and lets God amplify her actions. Beautiful. Convicting.

So this week, I took a step forward by opening our door (figuratively...it's quite chilly here), by turning the mental lock that keeps me safe but keeps others out, by saying yes to the opportunities God brings.

Here is this week's list of yeses:

• Hosting this week's Bible study
• Reaching out to a friend to spend some time together
• Beginning to plan an annual get-together that seemed like it might be too much this year
• Obeying a God-push to text a friend

It's a short list, but it's a start. Are you saying yes to new things this year? Will you share? Praying our lists will continue to grow. Consistently. In excellence.

 Linking up here today. Join us?

God-Sized Dreaming & My One Word

For the last few weeks I've been getting to know my fellow members of Holley Gerth's God-Sized Dreams Team, and I've been inspired by the size, direction, and progress of their goals. While I'm not in the position to write a book or teach or speak at conferences, I am equally excited to see how God works in 2013.

God-sized dreams are not the same as grand-sized dreams, as I am, thankfully, often reminded. God-sized dreams simply are the heart longings for more of what God has for us. And yet that isn't always so simple, is it?

So after searching, praying, fighting the little voice that says my dream is lame, here's my dream for 2013: to grow in hospitality, to use our new home to build community, to say yes to and pursue opportunities God brings into our lives.

Last March we felt God leading us to stay in our city, despite grad school offers in different states. Within a few weeks of making this decision and beginning to look at purchasing a house, a coworker informed me that he and his family were moving, and we had the following conversation:
K: "So I hear you're looking for a house."
Me: "Yes."
K: "Well...I have a house."

He then proceeded to describe his family's house and he quickly covered every item in our "Things We Hope for in a House but Know We Won't Actually Get Them All" list, right down to the number of bedrooms and space designated for our someday-piano. We received further confirmation about our decision when Nate was offered a new job that lightened the financial commitment and happened to start on the same day as our closing. Throw in an international mission the week before we closed, and the month of June drove us to the brink of brokenness and covered us in overwhelming, sustaining gratitude.

These converging blessings made one thing very clear: this home is God's alone. We are simply to use it to glorify Him. And so, my one word for 2013 is:

I seek to invite others into our home, to invite conversation, to invite the messy beauty of connecting with others, to invite God to use this year to whatever purpose He brings. I'm praying this one dream will grow into more, that opening our door will open another. And I'm guessing that if we are faithful in saying yes, we'll look back one 2013 once again in awe of the perfect plan of our Creator, the One still creating, moving, refining.

And of course, I'd be a fool if I didn't invite you to come along...would you share? Are you dreaming this year? Praying for your dreams today. Hoping 2013 will be one of God-inspired awe.

God-sized dreams aren’t really about size at all–they’re about 
embracing  and pursuing the desires God has placed within your heart 
that perfectly fit who you are. God-sized dreams are part of your purpose 
and they lead to more joy, meaning, and hope in your life. 

Holley Gerth 

Want to be inspired? Check out other God-Sized dreams and link up with us!